Tom Watson is live blogging AMC's Mad Men tonight over at newcritics. And I'd like to invite all blue girl readers to plop themselves in front of their TVs and their computers at the same time and join the conversation in the comments.
I missed the first episode of Mad Men last week. But, from what I've read, it's about advertising's glory days when men were real men and women were women who did feminine, frilly, slave-like womenly things.
I've been in advertising for more than 20 years. Not old enough to have been part of this wonderful industry's glory days. So, I can only imagine what some of those womanly things were.
"You take your coffee how? Oh! All over the front of your shirt? I'm really good at that!"
I would've been fired during advertising's glory days.
Actually, something like that happened to me at the first advertising agency I worked at. I was 22. I was in a meeting with seven or eight men, two of which were the owners of the agency. The Skimmer might have been there, too. If he was, it was before we started dating. I was a production manager then, which meant that I priced all the jobs, I coordinated the printing jobs with the printers, dealt with the magazines about the ads, proofread, cajoled people to hurry up, cajoled or yelled at people who were slow and didn't understand the meaning of hurry up, yelled at people who didn't know how to spell -- or read -- when a memo went around that said "What's taking you so long?! It's due now!!."
Ick, blech, gahhh and grrrrr. Being a production manager is the most under-appreciated position there is in advertising next to traffic manager -- who has to cajole and yell way more than a production manager.
Anyway, I was in this meeting, and the creative director, a man in his late 30s at the time, who wore a beard and bad polyester blazers, turned to me and said, rather nonchalantly, as if not giving it a second thought, "Hey, go get me a cup of coffee. Two creams, two sugars."
"What?"
"Can you get me some coffee?"
I laughed, "Are you crazy?"
"No."
"Get it yourself."
"I really need some coffee."
"Well, if you need it so bad, get up and walk the 20 feet it'll take you to get to the coffee maker and get it yourself. God, Kevin, what is up with you?!"
There was silence as slow poke Kevin got up and went into the kitchen to get his cup of coffee. I just sat there and shook my head. I have no recollection of what the other men said, if they said anything at all. But, I do wonder what they thought.
I always liked Kevin, though. He was a writer. Pretty good copywriter, but looking back, his headlines were a little corny and obvious. That's probably where I got it from. He was sort of an oddball, but I liked the oddball part of him. I give him credit for making me feel and imagine that Cape Cod is a romantic place to vacation. He would vacation there every year and come back with neat stories about how much time he spent there writing.
The Skimmer and I went on our first date to Kevin's wedding. And he was a groomsman in our wedding a couple of years later. This was all after the Infamous Coffee Debacle of 1986.
He was a sore at me for embarrassing him in front of all the guys in that meeting. And, although I was sore at him for acting like such a creep to begin with, I was relentless with him. I never let him forget it. Every time I'd see him going into the kitchen, I'd ask him to grab me a cup of coffee. Even at 22, I drove everything into the ground.
He lightened up after awhile, and I don't think he ever did that to a woman ever again. Maybe he grew up and didn't feel he needed to prove his manlihood any longer. I don't know. Anyway.
That year, I got Kevin's name in the Christmas gift exchange. I had the perfect present!
I had a photo of me and my college roommates, where we were all flipping the bird at the camera. I know, so un-blue girl-like. So shameful. I'll probably never become Miss America because of it.
I enlarged the photo and cropped it so only I was in it. I bought a small, 3 x 4 heart shaped picture frame. My picture fit perfectly in the frame with my intended emotion dead center. It was a thing of beauty.
Kevin got a huge kick out of it and kept it on his desk, next to his phone for years until I left for another job. I've always given him credit for that, too.
As M.A. Peel wrote in her review of Mad Men:
But for me, it’s the characterization of women that makes me wonder if I will spend much time in this world. It may be historically accurate, but I don’t find it charming.
I came of age in the relatively privileged 1980s. The ‘70s Feminism was still wafting in the air, but the roots that had propelled it didn’t touch my sheltered life. I was always encouraged at home to strive for whatever I could attain, and I never worked as anyone’s assistant.
When I read that part of M.A.'s review, I wondered what I would think of this aspect of the show. I'm the sort of person who thinks then was then and now is now. We've come a long way, baby. Them days are over.
So, I'll be tuning in tonight at 10, multitasking with my TV and my computer to find out. Won't you join in the sexist fun? But, don't let it go to your heads. I'll be there, but if you want something to drink, you'll have to get up off your lazy tush and get it yourself. Don't make me send you my picture.
***
Mad Men on AMC and over at newcritics. 10 PM EDT, 9 Central.
When I was at an age, older than yours, we had a woman, also at an age older than yours, at a negotiation. She was a peer, at least of some of us, and the old guy in the room asked her to fetch some coffee.
This was at my office so I went with her to show her the kitchen. On the way, I teased her about it. In fact, for the weeks between this and the closing, all of us who were her peers teased her about it. "Say, I'm feeling peckish," we'd say. "Could you get me a sandwich?"
She'd laugh and flip us off. I'm not sure the old guy ever got it, but by teasing her we made her part of us against him instead of us against her.
Posted by: Snag | July 27, 2007 at 12:41 AM
I once threw (or should I say through?) a drink on my boss at one of his parties for being a bigoted jerk.
Anyways, thanks, no. We'll either be going to see an Irish punk band tonight or sitting on the deck drinking and playing with my iPhone.
Posted by: billy pilgrim | July 27, 2007 at 10:45 AM
"playing with my iPhone."
You'll go BLIND! And grow i-hair on your palms! Don't you know that BP!?!?
Posted by: Jennifer | July 27, 2007 at 11:17 AM
@bp: THE pOWER OF GATES COMPELS YOU!
Posted by: almostinfamous | July 27, 2007 at 12:30 PM
That coffee story is great and everything about it, including the college photo, epitomizes the Blue Girl everyone knows and loves. No nonsense if you're out of line, followed by friendly teasing that becomes a in-joke forevah. The jokes remains fun, though, because of bg's nice, light touch. Touche! (Imagine an accent mark over the "e". Someday I'll learn at a little HTML: promise.)
Posted by: grasshopperkm | July 27, 2007 at 01:06 PM
Blue, belatedly just dropped in to your joint today, and I goddam love your coffee story.
It's nice that you seemed to be able to smack some sense into Kevin's head after all.
Posted by: Dan Leo | July 27, 2007 at 02:37 PM
I began as a copywriter at Campbell-Ewald in Detroit. That was 1970 -- not much later than the Mad Men show depicts. I don't remember any copywriter or art director wearing a suit. Maybe I missed the suit years by a smidge. Possibly N.Y. copywriters were more fastidious. But a lot of the show didn't ring true o me.
Loved your coffee story. That rings true.
Posted by: Fred Wickham | July 28, 2007 at 11:12 PM
I grew up 'round the same time as you, BG. In my early experiences, women mostly did the support work, but, except for a few who seemed to actually "like" getting literally pushed around, it always seemed to me that it was they who truly ran the show. The men may surely bluster and call out the shots, but when the women called 'em out, they almost always listened up. Presumably there was some payoff, invisible to us kids, beyond "mere" respect. Whatever the reason, I feel it's scarred me for life.
{-;
I hope your friend Kevin stumbles 'cross this post. 'Twas truly a fun read!
Posted by: Michael Bains | July 29, 2007 at 09:29 AM
Let me clarify that I am not the Kevin mentioned in BG's excellent story.
I may have to get my cable TV reinstalled so I can join in the live blogging.
Posted by: Kevin Wolf | July 29, 2007 at 07:44 PM
I, too, am not the Kevin mentioned in BG's excellent story.
Posted by: Neddie Jingo | July 30, 2007 at 11:44 AM
I watched the first couple of episodes of 'Mad Men' but I grew up in that era and I find the misogynistic aspect unpalatable, so, even though the series is very pretty to look at, I'm going to give it a pass.
Posted by: Sylvia | August 08, 2007 at 03:25 AM
I watched the first couple of episodes of 'Mad Men' but I grew up in that era and I find the misogynistic aspect unpalatable, so, even though the series is very pretty to look at, I'm going to give it a pass.
Posted by: Sylvia | August 08, 2007 at 03:26 AM