Our waitress last night had pretty hair, long waves of deep red, heavy curls held back from her face by small, jeweled butterfly clips. She was tiny, had dark green eyes, and wore a faded blue peasant top and snug fitting, low-waisted jeans.
She was attentive to The Skimmer as he tried to figure out what kind of beer to order.
"No one ever has the type of beer I want."
"We have over 70 varieties to choose from. What kind do you like?"
"Anchor Steam."
"Anchor Steam? We have Anchor Steam."
"Hey, whattyaknow. I'll take one."
"You got it."
She winked, picked up the menus and headed to the bar and I leaned into The Skimmer and said, "She is a doll." And without missing a beat he said, "She wants me."
I laughed, "She does?! How do you know?"
"I got a vibe."
"Yeah, you got a vibe."
I looked around the restaurant. We had accidentally stumbled into a hipster restaurant/bar after an art show where The Skimmer had several of his pieces on display. Lots of scenesters of all ages eating, drinking, nuzzling, mingling. It was my kind of room. Exposed brick walls, hardwood floors, a tiny, intimate space with low, warm lighting. I noticed a couple at a corner table, sitting close and I turned to The Skimmer and said, "You know, maybe I should offer you what Cheryl David offered Larry."
"What?"
"You know, a vacation from marriage for one night. One night. One night only! With The Deep, Wavy Redhead or whoever you'd want."
"I could never do that."
I laughed, "Why?"
"I'd get too nervous."
"Go ahead. You can do it. All I ask is no diseases!"
"And, oh man, would I ever get picky."
Which really made me laugh. And feel relieved. That he didn't immediately hurdle the table and start talking up the blonde near the front door or any other number of women of all ages, shapes and sizes in that dark little room.
Deep Wavy Redhead returned with our drinks, cute as ever. She placed my wine in front of me and then slowly slid The Skimmer's beer in front of him as she leaned towards us and asked, "Are you two going anywhere after this?"
Which I thought was a strange question but replied, "Nope, just going home."
She smiled, shrugged her shoulders and headed back to the bar.
The Skimmer said, "She wants a threesome."
Which really made me laugh even harder, "Oh my God!"
He lifted his beer and also his left eyebrow. And I said to him, "I am not a part of the deal I offered you. Let's just keep that in mind. Where it's gonna have to stay."
Where does the Skimmer have some paintings up? I want to go see them! And I'm curious which hipster place you stumbled in to... :)
Posted by: Claire | March 27, 2011 at 10:39 PM
He lifted his beer and also his left eyebrow.
I really wish I could lift one eyebrow.
Posted by: fish | March 28, 2011 at 09:28 AM
This is really a *Sooo Skimmer* Post, love it and him!!
Really wishing the Cooler and I could've been in the hipster place with you, wonder if they would've been any braver together.... Nah!
Posted by: Jenny | March 28, 2011 at 11:22 AM
LOL!
Great story!!
Posted by: Von | March 28, 2011 at 12:51 PM
Sounds like a fun night!
Posted by: Jennifer | March 28, 2011 at 02:45 PM
LOL!
Posted by: Kathleen | March 28, 2011 at 05:13 PM
Claire, the show was just Sat night at a little place down in the Short North. It was called Enigma Gallery, I think? This is the cool little place we stumbled into.
Don't feel bad, fish, I can't lift one eyebrow either. :)
Jenny, maybe we'll go there when you're in town in a couple of weeks. I made friends with the bouncer. Maybe he'll card us. lol
It was fun, Jennifer! Thought of you as I was surrounded by all that artwork.
And thanks for the LOL's, Ladies!
Posted by: blue girl | March 28, 2011 at 08:28 PM
I *totally* had guessed you went to Bodega. Mostly because of the amount of beers on tap. Love that place. :) We need to hang out again soon.
Posted by: Claire | March 28, 2011 at 10:15 PM
I can lift my left eyebrow. It's a bit harder to do the right one without moving 'em both.
~
Posted by: ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© | March 28, 2011 at 10:17 PM
I love leaping to conclusions, BG. Like thinking that maybe you're back. Anyway, New York has missed you.
Posted by: Brenda | March 29, 2011 at 03:58 PM
You will have to practice, thunder!
Brenda, thanks for the comment. I miss New York too.
Posted by: blue girl | March 29, 2011 at 09:54 PM
shave 'em off and they are easy to lift.
Posted by: zombie rotten mcdonald | March 31, 2011 at 12:24 PM
I had no idea lifting one eyebrow was special skill. Left, right, right, left...maybe that's why people look at me funny. Too bad there's no money in it like all my other little skills.
Oh, and imagining an art gallery that's not an enigma? That one eludes me.
Posted by: Kathleen Maher | April 04, 2011 at 12:11 PM